I'm Still Alive and Free
I'm Still Alive and FreeJust a quick note of explanation for my regular audience.
I haven't made a new video in a long time and website updates have become irregular. For proof-of-life (hehe) you might want to follow my "associate" on Twitter. (see: (4) Mrs. Smith (@FringeViews) / Twitter )
Many of you know I had intended to take a break in January but put it off to cover the Trucker Convoy in Canada. It was a very important moment for my country so I used every last bit of energy I had to do reports about it at the time. After the convoy coverage I did the one WEF Global Shapers video because I felt the information was important as it gave the public a chance to pinpoint exactly​ who they could track and approach in their local areas. I was glad to see that information spread far and wide! Thank you to everyone who jumped on that topic and contributed with their own research, sharing the video, etc.
After that Global Shapers report went out, I ran out of gas.
Look, I know these moaning-type posts must be getting boring for you. It's not a subject I want to be writing about, believe me, but I think an explanation is warranted after such a long absence. My apologies if the following comes off as self-indulgent but there are those who I know are worried about me or who are wondering whether or not I'm gone for good so this post is for them. (God bless all of you for your genuine care, concern and connection. I am so grateful and blessed beyond words to have such a wonderful group around me.)
Let me start by acknowledging something important that is missing from the bulk of commentary in this day and age: we are living in a time of disorientation, loss, grief, desperation, information overload, and (mostly falsified) existential terror. We are being tortured, and torture works. People lose themselves. People acquiesce to all sorts of things they didn't think possible under normal circumstances. People go into shock. People give up, they cave in, and people die. Even though torture always​ succeeds in changing a person, it is not all negative in the end. I would never, ever advocate for torture and believe it to be a great evil, so don't mistake my message here. But there are some individuals who become stronger in some ways from the experience. Changed, and mostly negatively so, but having been forged in the fire their resolve hardens and becomes unbreakable. During the period of torture, however, each individual suffers in different measure according to his or her own constitution. Like it or not, that is where we are now. We are all still enduring the torture. What has been forced upon us for the past two (or more) years has been and continues to be a destruction of society, economy, culture, family, faith and individuals. Whatever stage you're in at the moment, however you are personally dealing with the torture I'm sure you will be able to relate to some of what I'm about to write.
Without getting into details, I can share that I've been lost in the Land of Deep Mourning for a while now. At first, even though the Covid Craziness was horrifying, I had been able to face it because my personal world remained intact. I had a sheltered island to retreat to while the surrounding sea was roiled by fear, doubt and uncertainty. For about 16 months following March 2020 I was able to see, research and deliver all the ugly news without it eating away at my heart and soul. I went to sleep at night peacefully because I felt that from my island I could perhaps help to inform people and thus help bring sanity back to society with my little contributions. This foundation - my island - had been all I needed to be able to carry on staring into the abyss, bring you reports, and even have a chuckle from time to time.
In September my island sunk into the deep. I can't tell you what happened for the sake of privacy though I dearly wish to dilute the exquisite pain contained in the story by pouring it out of me and into the hearts of all who read it. To do so would be selfish, though, so I choose to contain it within. Suffice to say that it was a blindside. The facts took weeks to fully set in and the emotional rollercoaster has not come to a stop yet. Since September I've been dealing with the typical stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining and depression. Since this wasn't a death there's not been an end point. I can't accept it because the future is still unfolding. Maybe instead of 'acceptance' which is supposed to be the final stage of grief I will have to learn to live with it in another way.
In any case, what I found was that I couldn't look at the news any more. All of it was (is?) too painful. I could (can) barely interact with people. Who will I be when I come out the other end of this? How much of this is me being over-dramatic? What do I want for the future and am I even in control of this death/rebirth that I feel I'm going through?
Coincidentally (or probably not) my physical health began to deteriorate as well. It is mostly my eyes, as it was when I'd tried to escape Ontario and drive part way across the country. (Is this God or the Adversary stepping in I wonder?) Perhaps it is related to the fact that everything is twice as difficult to do now but my energy level has plummeted to a concerning level. What with the medical system here having bottomed out - not only will doctors not see patients in the office (hello Great Reset & Telehealth) - but I'm dubious in the extreme about interacting with it anyway.
As you can probably guess much of my work time is spent reading so with very blurry vision, well, you can guess how that has impacted my routine. And not just for reading, of course, but for all aspects of life. Perhaps de to the psychological factors in play I have found that when I try to work I feel nauseated and shaky, like I've been through a form of aversion therapy (torture, maybe.) On the other hand not​ working and not producing has also been very difficult. This is the basic shape of the hole I'm trying to climb out of with the help of distance, prayer and reflection.
As I type today I believe I'll be able to make a video soon, God willing. I'm feeling a little better lately and I've worked out some 'Mad Max' solutions for my ever-changing vision (see pic). Just a few days ago I got a new pair which works today but may not work a week from now. Luckily I have kept almost every pair of glasses I have ever worn, so I have material to work with. 🙂 Hey - it's a head start on the coping skills we'll all need in the 'you-will-own-nothing-and-be-happy' future, right? I can be the hobo optician. Ha!
Once again I apologize for making a post that is all about me and my problems (cringe) but as I said I've been away long enough that my monthly subscribers and other supporters were owed an honest explanation for my absence.
Thanks for reading, and don't forget to check out that twitter link. Mrs. Smith would be happy to see you.
God bless,
Polly
314
reviews
Murray
19 Apr 2022
Polly - we all still love you and the work you have done!! Do NOT wreck your life for us - just live it as it unfolds to you in in the healthiest way possibly. And listen to Jordan Peterson when you need an uplift :)
Dr Kent J Albrecht DC PC
19 Apr 2022
I have been noticing the absence on Rumble since 3/22. At 1st I sensed the need for a "break" following the "truckers" campaign, so assumed you were in a "leave". Ive looked every few days, over the last several weeks, them grew more distantly concerned for your actual "safety" knowing just how corrupt and dangerous our Controllers can be.
Thank you for the update, as youve been in our prayers for protection, and encouragement in these Laodecian end times.
Victory is yours when you keep your Faith in His Victory alone ... All else is "self" and falls short ultimately.
I Corinthians 1:17- 2:4.
drkent
Thank you for the update, as youve been in our prayers for protection, and encouragement in these Laodecian end times.
Victory is yours when you keep your Faith in His Victory alone ... All else is "self" and falls short ultimately.
I Corinthians 1:17- 2:4.
drkent
Bubba5004
19 Apr 2022
Oh Polly, I’ve prayed that your leave was only temporary. There is so much evil and craziness in the world today. My only encouragement is my faith which keeps me praying and looking for Gods hand in this mess. As several have said if God is not in this, all is lost. I believe He is. Thanks for sharing. It motivates me to pray even more frequently for you. LOVE AND MISS YOU!! Bubba
Monica St
19 Apr 2022
Polly, you have been missed. Please seek some alternative health care there must be something. I saw a retired Dr say it's your blood sugar or possible thyroid. I do hope your out walking and now that the weather is getting nicer you can go barefoot and get some grounding. Soon maybe you can go fishing. Head over to Six Nations ask around for my sister Snook at Maracle Man's. And tell her say, your sister said to come tell you to have Boots take you fishing. You Polly and your Hubby. You'll feel like you've been taken back in time. I'm in the states so I can't be there to greet you. But venture that way, your not far from the Rez. Love you and God bless you. I miss your research news. Your the best Polly I've not found another like you. Take care
Guy
19 Apr 2022
Hi Polly, I came by to check on you, I'm so glad that I found you well, resting & taking time for you and the family. You're one of my 'Top 3' shows that I love to watch and am really missing you. Your perspective is always something that brings me back to a 'middle' that I cannot always find by myself. God Bless!!! See you when you get back. Much love from my farm in southern Manitoba!!
Michele
18 Apr 2022
I just found something alarming...
There are other truth tellers "missing", too.
Hope Girl on Bitchute is asking about Wil Paranormal and mentions Polly.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/V9s7w9CHaQOp/
Is it really our friend Polly who wrote this about being still alive and free?
There are other truth tellers "missing", too.
Hope Girl on Bitchute is asking about Wil Paranormal and mentions Polly.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/V9s7w9CHaQOp/
Is it really our friend Polly who wrote this about being still alive and free?
jeff
18 Apr 2022
Polly, it's your blood sugar that's causing your health and especially your vision issues. The other possibility is your thyroid.
Retired eye doctor,
Jeff Hilton
Retired eye doctor,
Jeff Hilton
Efrem Wilder
18 Apr 2022
Hi Polly; Thank you for all your commentary over the past 2 and a half years since i found you..
Your (Amazing:) analysis is Truly impressive, as is your detailed examination of the Evil at hand.
You are a gifted lady Mrs Saint George i wish to you Godspeed in your endeavors, so that we see you again soon! Hang in There!!! The World needs you more than ever!
and Best Regards from Watertown New York
Your (Amazing:) analysis is Truly impressive, as is your detailed examination of the Evil at hand.
You are a gifted lady Mrs Saint George i wish to you Godspeed in your endeavors, so that we see you again soon! Hang in There!!! The World needs you more than ever!
and Best Regards from Watertown New York