It's All Fun and Games Until Somebody Loses an 'I'
Some of you may have noticed that I haven’t uploaded a video in a couple of weeks. I’m writing now to ask you to be patient with me and to tell you that I’m doing okay, not to worry. In this letter to you I’d like to explain a few things and give you a peek into my past and present. I’ve been asked many times about my research methods, and it’s been speculated here and there on the internet that I must have partners because, quote, “there’s no way she can do that all by herself.” Well, here’s the truth.
I do work alone and except for the odd article here and there that people have sent me via email I get my own leads and follow my own instincts to gather every piece of information that I use in my videos. I make all the graphics and do all the editing. Personally I don’t see why this is so unbelievable to anyone. I think the reason it may seem so is because I can draw on a wealth of material quite quickly and I have a wide range of knowledge in a variety of subject areas across a fairly long span of history. This is because of my past habits, not necessarily because of any unique methods of research.
Before I began posting videos in about March 2016 I had been an artist – a painter. Visual artists can tell you that this work is somewhat meditative and as such it is conducive to learning. While my hands and a part of my brain were occupied by the canvas I would listen to audiobooks, interviews and lectures on a wide variety of topics. It so happened that I had always been interested in ‘high weirdness’ so at first those were the topics I gravitated to before moving on to try to gain a deeper understanding of the world around me.
But I have to go back in time for a minute.
As a girl of 12 or 13 I read Erich Von Daniken’s Chariots of the Gods which blew my mind. A couple of years later I got to hear a friend’s family discussions about the unusual elements of the Kennedy Assassination and the Moon Landings which introduced me to the idea that recent history might not be what it seems. Part of my university education alerted me to the various ways in which ‘science’ had been and continued to be used to shape cultures and societies (this was before universities became indoctrination centers for the official narratives). My curiosity was always active, but after I left school and became a mother a lot of that got put on the back burner as my time and energy were monopolized by full time work, home maintenance and child rearing.
When my child got a little older and no longer needed (nor wanted) much of my attention I took up painting again and combined this with the wonders of the internet. I began with forbidden archeology and the mysteries of Egypt – these were fascinating to me as I marveled at all that was hidden from mainstream education. Most of all I wondered why. Why was the scope of education so repetitive and boring when there were so many things they could be bringing to students!?
After I ventured down those paths I began to look at the terror attacks of 9/11.
9/11 led me somehow to MKUltra, and then the Franklin Cover-Up. Then Operation Paperclip, Aaron Russo, Bill Cooper, Max Igan, Alex Jones, Central Banking, etc etc. In short I started to see the Matrix, and was beginning to learn how to read it.
After I gorged myself on those topics I went deeper and began listening to speakers and lecturers in biology, psychology, history, economics, religion, mathematics, energy – these things were often way above my head but over the years I learned the vocabulary, then the theories, the findings and finally could see the interconnectedness of these disciplines. In fact I began to feel that I saw the interconnectedness better than any of the individual specialists I was learning from. They were siloed, myopic. I wasn’t.
The frustration I began to encounter was that I had absolutely nowhere to discuss any of this. Inside I was very well read and had so many intellectual curiosities but in day-to-day life I was Mom, wife, daughter, pal, office drone who should know her place and stop talking about “weird, boring, irrelevant scary” things and stick to picking out tiles for the new bathroom or admiring the tiles someone else had recently installed.
Thankfully at that time I still found common ground with most people in my life. Indeed we *could* still talk about bathroom tiles … or vacations, movies, music, cooking, home renovation projects, etc without any trouble. For a long while I managed my ‘double life’ keeping my research life private like a spy would have to do but still enjoying the company of friends, family and society.
As I learned more I could see more patterns - I could project into the future, so to speak. That’s when things became troublesome for me. I felt I could see where society was heading and this naturally affected the way I planned, the way I communicated. It put up barriers between me and the people around me though I wasn’t really aware of it at the time. All I knew was that sometimes, for seemingly no reason, I would trigger people into blank stares or shock or (worst of all) “concern” for my well being. You see, I kept forgetting that they didn’t know the things I knew. I must have sounded like an alien to them, or a stranger, or even just a worry wart who was harshing their mellow instead of cheering them on for taking out a reverse mortgage (or some such dangerous credit instrument.)
Believe me, many were the times I’d stop and ask myself if I was the problem. Was I being indoctrinated into some kind of cult or being groomed into semi-insanity through the media I was consuming? Because although I felt perfectly sane I could feel a shift happening – a divide opening up between myself and the culture I’d always lived in and thrived on. To this day I perform these reality checks. I ask “What do I know *for sure?*” Back then the answers ranged from “I know house prices are skyrocketing for no valid reason and this is Big Trouble.” Or “I know the culture is beginning to become toxic.” Or “I know they are actively eliminating Christianity from the public sphere.” Or “I know they are lying about 9/11 and if they’ll lie about that what won’t they lie about?” I also knew that 99% of the people around me couldn’t see any of that, and they didn’t want to see.
In 2022, amid all the noise and fearmongering the answer which keeps me grounded is:
“I know that they are trying to force people to take an experimental genetic therapy and I know they are censoring a great deal of information and opinion.”
That’s enough for me to understand that my questioning mind is still sane and my concern is righteous.
Okay – what does any of this have to do with me not producing videos at the moment?
The problem is twofold.
1. It’s been years now since I have had the chance to paint, listen and learn.
Over the past 4 years my well of inspiration has run dry as I’ve chased the news and put together timely videos. When I began publishing deep dives I was still nourished by all those years of immersing myself in the words and ideas of learned people combined with my original findings and linkages. Now, I am saturated by mere sound bites –opinion columns, tweets and tabloid videos. Those are not nourishment, those are vending machine snacks. Without wanting to sound over-dramatic the word that comes to mind when I think about all of this is ‘poisoned.’
In short: I first need to detox, then take time to feed my mind, soul and body better intellectual and spiritual food. I am doing that now and loving it. (see pic for my current endeavours)
2. Once again I seem to be alone in my understanding of what’s going on. That’s not to say that I’m right and everyone else is wrong, it’s meant to say that my own perspective on it is not the same as others.’ More and more lately my ‘take’ on things is at odds with the general consensus on every side. Further, since I am a genuine person who doesn’t like to paper-over my feelings for the sake of going-along, I am finding it difficult to produce work that will inform/uplift my audience. Judging from the letters I receive I don’t believe people need any more speculation or bad news and in some ways that’s all I’d have to offer if I were to go online with my thoughts. In short: I don’t know what to say or how to say it right now.
Finally I will admit that there are personal reasons why I am silent at the moment. I would like to live my life in accordance with my inner guidance system but for various reasons I can’t move forward and I’m struggling to chart a course. I am working to overcome that but man oh man these are some tricky waters to navigate. Some days I feel I might drown, others I sail on calm seas. I’m sure you all share this experience.
I will return with videos as soon as I can.
In the meantime I’m keeping my website updated with material from around the internet and hope you’ll find those items informative and interesting.
God bless you all.
Polly
265
reviews
Tom Harding
26 Jan 2022
Polly, you have written the words for me! This is precisely how I also feel. Unfortunately due to a stroke I can no longer write legibly (even for myself to read) so I cannot express my gratitude adequately.
I have been a fan of yours for, it seems, ever. You seem to articulate many of my thoughts. I was always considered by others as singularly articulate but YOU truly have that gift!
I too question everything and believe nor disbelieve anything until I have done thorough research.
As an auldfella of 79 I had an exciting and ultra adventurous life and easily made friends. However the plandemic and the obnoxious lockdown has decimated them. Even my own siblings now avoid me as if I have some plague and, as I don’t drive I am in some form of purdah. I live in a tiny hamlet peopled by my former close ‘friends’ who now all avoid me as I refuse to take ‘the jab’. As often as possible I hobble a mile to catch the bus to town. There I try to attend a classical concert with an old friend…but she is merely trying to do me a ‘great favour’ so, you see, this kills a lot of the pleasure for me. I’m sorry for wittering on but when I started this I’m afraid I got carried away!
BTW- I have a great passion for Art and am resolved to be a painter next time around! I have a degree in History of Art and it has been my lifetime passion (except for square-rigged ships) and but for spending decades on them I would have become a marine painter!
I have been a fan of yours for, it seems, ever. You seem to articulate many of my thoughts. I was always considered by others as singularly articulate but YOU truly have that gift!
I too question everything and believe nor disbelieve anything until I have done thorough research.
As an auldfella of 79 I had an exciting and ultra adventurous life and easily made friends. However the plandemic and the obnoxious lockdown has decimated them. Even my own siblings now avoid me as if I have some plague and, as I don’t drive I am in some form of purdah. I live in a tiny hamlet peopled by my former close ‘friends’ who now all avoid me as I refuse to take ‘the jab’. As often as possible I hobble a mile to catch the bus to town. There I try to attend a classical concert with an old friend…but she is merely trying to do me a ‘great favour’ so, you see, this kills a lot of the pleasure for me. I’m sorry for wittering on but when I started this I’m afraid I got carried away!
BTW- I have a great passion for Art and am resolved to be a painter next time around! I have a degree in History of Art and it has been my lifetime passion (except for square-rigged ships) and but for spending decades on them I would have become a marine painter!
S
26 Jan 2022
Hi Polly, love, love, love your deep dives. Thanks for the update...
I just wanted to implore you to take another look at this convoy... It broke a Guinness record already. It's more than the media is making it out to be. Reports are that the #1 was lined with people for over 3 hours waiting for the convoy in Manitoba last night. It was close to -30. Restoring faith in Canadians for me and many others. This thing has a lot of momentum behind it. It's a big deal.
I just wanted to implore you to take another look at this convoy... It broke a Guinness record already. It's more than the media is making it out to be. Reports are that the #1 was lined with people for over 3 hours waiting for the convoy in Manitoba last night. It was close to -30. Restoring faith in Canadians for me and many others. This thing has a lot of momentum behind it. It's a big deal.
Cene
26 Jan 2022
Polly: I love you. Take the time you need. But I need to hear what you have to say about Davos deciding a cyber virus is imminent & the internet will have to ho down for cleansing & power grid shutdown worldwide. We may all get a break soon !!!! Let’s hear it, Polly !!!! Then finish the break. Remember- always praying for you & your like minded countrymen!!!!!
Nancy Price
26 Jan 2022
Hi Polly, I enjoy all your videos and education. I am 75 ,and almost everyone my age rolls their eyes when I try to enlighten them. I got rid of TV more than a year ago, and many nights I would search to see your newest video. I so admire your skills and delighted to find out about your art background. You are a friend. Rejuvenate and God will provide all your needs.
Amanda
26 Jan 2022
Polly, thank you so much for sharing your soul with us and giving yourself so completely. You were a part of my original awakening and I've seen every single video you've made, some more than once. I've always considered you to be the most grounded "Patriot Type" personality I follow and I came here to make sure things were ok with your (or the family) after 2 weeks and 1 day of no videos. I recently found myself in the same place; My social perspective is completely different than everyone around me. So, it's time for a change of life to rejuvenate the soul. Happy Trails, Fren.
Geraldine Zipf
26 Jan 2022
To everything a time and a season…
Enjoy gathering stones…
Thank you and God bless you.
Enjoy gathering stones…
Thank you and God bless you.