I'm Still Alive and Free
I'm Still Alive and FreeJust a quick note of explanation for my regular audience.
I haven't made a new video in a long time and website updates have become irregular. For proof-of-life (hehe) you might want to follow my "associate" on Twitter. (see: (4) Mrs. Smith (@FringeViews) / Twitter )
Many of you know I had intended to take a break in January but put it off to cover the Trucker Convoy in Canada. It was a very important moment for my country so I used every last bit of energy I had to do reports about it at the time. After the convoy coverage I did the one WEF Global Shapers video because I felt the information was important as it gave the public a chance to pinpoint exactly who they could track and approach in their local areas. I was glad to see that information spread far and wide! Thank you to everyone who jumped on that topic and contributed with their own research, sharing the video, etc.
After that Global Shapers report went out, I ran out of gas.
Look, I know these moaning-type posts must be getting boring for you. It's not a subject I want to be writing about, believe me, but I think an explanation is warranted after such a long absence. My apologies if the following comes off as self-indulgent but there are those who I know are worried about me or who are wondering whether or not I'm gone for good so this post is for them. (God bless all of you for your genuine care, concern and connection. I am so grateful and blessed beyond words to have such a wonderful group around me.)
Let me start by acknowledging something important that is missing from the bulk of commentary in this day and age: we are living in a time of disorientation, loss, grief, desperation, information overload, and (mostly falsified) existential terror. We are being tortured, and torture works. People lose themselves. People acquiesce to all sorts of things they didn't think possible under normal circumstances. People go into shock. People give up, they cave in, and people die. Even though torture always succeeds in changing a person, it is not all negative in the end. I would never, ever advocate for torture and believe it to be a great evil, so don't mistake my message here. But there are some individuals who become stronger in some ways from the experience. Changed, and mostly negatively so, but having been forged in the fire their resolve hardens and becomes unbreakable. During the period of torture, however, each individual suffers in different measure according to his or her own constitution. Like it or not, that is where we are now. We are all still enduring the torture. What has been forced upon us for the past two (or more) years has been and continues to be a destruction of society, economy, culture, family, faith and individuals. Whatever stage you're in at the moment, however you are personally dealing with the torture I'm sure you will be able to relate to some of what I'm about to write.
Without getting into details, I can share that I've been lost in the Land of Deep Mourning for a while now. At first, even though the Covid Craziness was horrifying, I had been able to face it because my personal world remained intact. I had a sheltered island to retreat to while the surrounding sea was roiled by fear, doubt and uncertainty. For about 16 months following March 2020 I was able to see, research and deliver all the ugly news without it eating away at my heart and soul. I went to sleep at night peacefully because I felt that from my island I could perhaps help to inform people and thus help bring sanity back to society with my little contributions. This foundation - my island - had been all I needed to be able to carry on staring into the abyss, bring you reports, and even have a chuckle from time to time.
In September my island sunk into the deep. I can't tell you what happened for the sake of privacy though I dearly wish to dilute the exquisite pain contained in the story by pouring it out of me and into the hearts of all who read it. To do so would be selfish, though, so I choose to contain it within. Suffice to say that it was a blindside. The facts took weeks to fully set in and the emotional rollercoaster has not come to a stop yet. Since September I've been dealing with the typical stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining and depression. Since this wasn't a death there's not been an end point. I can't accept it because the future is still unfolding. Maybe instead of 'acceptance' which is supposed to be the final stage of grief I will have to learn to live with it in another way.
In any case, what I found was that I couldn't look at the news any more. All of it was (is?) too painful. I could (can) barely interact with people. Who will I be when I come out the other end of this? How much of this is me being over-dramatic? What do I want for the future and am I even in control of this death/rebirth that I feel I'm going through?
Coincidentally (or probably not) my physical health began to deteriorate as well. It is mostly my eyes, as it was when I'd tried to escape Ontario and drive part way across the country. (Is this God or the Adversary stepping in I wonder?) Perhaps it is related to the fact that everything is twice as difficult to do now but my energy level has plummeted to a concerning level. What with the medical system here having bottomed out - not only will doctors not see patients in the office (hello Great Reset & Telehealth) - but I'm dubious in the extreme about interacting with it anyway.
As you can probably guess much of my work time is spent reading so with very blurry vision, well, you can guess how that has impacted my routine. And not just for reading, of course, but for all aspects of life. Perhaps de to the psychological factors in play I have found that when I try to work I feel nauseated and shaky, like I've been through a form of aversion therapy (torture, maybe.) On the other hand not working and not producing has also been very difficult. This is the basic shape of the hole I'm trying to climb out of with the help of distance, prayer and reflection.
As I type today I believe I'll be able to make a video soon, God willing. I'm feeling a little better lately and I've worked out some 'Mad Max' solutions for my ever-changing vision (see pic). Just a few days ago I got a new pair which works today but may not work a week from now. Luckily I have kept almost every pair of glasses I have ever worn, so I have material to work with. 🙂 Hey - it's a head start on the coping skills we'll all need in the 'you-will-own-nothing-and-be-happy' future, right? I can be the hobo optician. Ha!
Once again I apologize for making a post that is all about me and my problems (cringe) but as I said I've been away long enough that my monthly subscribers and other supporters were owed an honest explanation for my absence.
Thanks for reading, and don't forget to check out that twitter link. Mrs. Smith would be happy to see you.
God bless,
Polly
314
reviews
TreeWhisperer
10 Apr 2022
Dear Polly, Thankyou for sharing that you are still Alive and Free. Thankyou for sharing in that intimate way that you have a knack for, a mirror for what so many of us are feeling and encountering during this time and of course with the work that you do I can totally I understand how this can be a considerable contributing factor. Plus the personal sinking island event.
Prayers Up Polly 🙏🏾So much heart warming love and advice from all us Polly admirers in the comments that I can actually feel the love and connection we all have all the way from Australia 🌿 I too have been choosing to actually live the life I choose to live in the alternate real, earthy world as an antidote to the torture.
My eye tips: ionic or Collodial silver as an eye wash when needed. Plus the well known cucumber slice over the eyes is refreshing and focusing. Plants are our Allies, also find chant meditation ( like Ohm ( see Sadhguru you tube ) have enabled me to embrace the healing power of sound. Everything is frequencies. Very grounding. Blessing every drink of water. Slowing down to embrace each moment whilst the turbulent storm of the Awakening makes it’s way over us. It must be coming into Spring in your Northern country ? May you find solace, healing and inspo in the blossoming of the sleeping winter world coming awake to embrace the Sun 🌞 🌱🌸
Prayers Up Polly 🙏🏾So much heart warming love and advice from all us Polly admirers in the comments that I can actually feel the love and connection we all have all the way from Australia 🌿 I too have been choosing to actually live the life I choose to live in the alternate real, earthy world as an antidote to the torture.
My eye tips: ionic or Collodial silver as an eye wash when needed. Plus the well known cucumber slice over the eyes is refreshing and focusing. Plants are our Allies, also find chant meditation ( like Ohm ( see Sadhguru you tube ) have enabled me to embrace the healing power of sound. Everything is frequencies. Very grounding. Blessing every drink of water. Slowing down to embrace each moment whilst the turbulent storm of the Awakening makes it’s way over us. It must be coming into Spring in your Northern country ? May you find solace, healing and inspo in the blossoming of the sleeping winter world coming awake to embrace the Sun 🌞 🌱🌸
Lysa
10 Apr 2022
Was thrilled to see your update! Been terribly worried for your safety. Welcome here at our farm in VA if you ever need a place To go!
Olga
10 Apr 2022
Easter is a good time to withdraw and renew Polly. One of my friends asked how you were after the last few video booms. We are all dealing with the nasty side of life now. Your last video was very important for us because we have elections and we need to know who we are voting for. Hopefully our elections will not be stolen.
There is a lot of good advice in the comments. One thing which works for us is - put back in what you take out. When we have a bad day (usually dealing with another person who is not being nice), we take the next day off and do non-social things like gardening.
May you and yours have a peaceful Easter.
There is a lot of good advice in the comments. One thing which works for us is - put back in what you take out. When we have a bad day (usually dealing with another person who is not being nice), we take the next day off and do non-social things like gardening.
May you and yours have a peaceful Easter.
AyeMe4tner
10 Apr 2022
More...because I forgot some of the most important part
“Keep up your spirit, keep up your faith, baby
I am counting on you
You know what you've got to do
Fight the good fight every moment
Every minute every day
Fight the good fight every moment
It's your only way”
https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/triumph/fightthegoodfight.html
You will be back stronger than ever after you do some healing and much deserved self-care. I’ve been doing shadow work myself. I know how painful it can be. However, it has been worth it to face and stand up to my demons.
“Keep up your spirit, keep up your faith, baby
I am counting on you
You know what you've got to do
Fight the good fight every moment
Every minute every day
Fight the good fight every moment
It's your only way”
https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/triumph/fightthegoodfight.html
You will be back stronger than ever after you do some healing and much deserved self-care. I’ve been doing shadow work myself. I know how painful it can be. However, it has been worth it to face and stand up to my demons.
AyeMe4tner
10 Apr 2022
Sometimes music helps me cope, so here is a song for Polly...& many hugs and wishes for lots of blessings your way 🤗
Fight the Good Fight by Triumph
“Every day it seems much harder tellin' right from wrong
You got to read between the lines
Don't get discouraged, don't be afraid, we can
Make it through another day
Make it worth the price we pay
The Good Book says it's better to give than to receive
I do my best to do my part
Nothin' in my pockets I got nothin' up my sleeve
I keep my magic in my heart”
https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/triumph/fightthegoodfight.html
Fight the Good Fight by Triumph
“Every day it seems much harder tellin' right from wrong
You got to read between the lines
Don't get discouraged, don't be afraid, we can
Make it through another day
Make it worth the price we pay
The Good Book says it's better to give than to receive
I do my best to do my part
Nothin' in my pockets I got nothin' up my sleeve
I keep my magic in my heart”
https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/triumph/fightthegoodfight.html
Take the time you need come back fighting, stronger than ever ! We are going to win !
Joe
10 Apr 2022
Polly, thank-you for posting this update. It is a relief to know you are 'Still Alive and Free'!
Yet, sorry to know of the bad spell you are recovering from.
I have been a fan from the very first video I was fortunate enough to see, way back on Youtube. I've never seen any other vlogger even close to doing the excellent work you have done. You really are 'amazing'. The digging for details, and then integrating it all into a coherent picture. And this always conveyed to us with such a heart for truth and clear sense of justice. I still have not heard or read such a clear and comprehensive review of the ratworks behind the Plandemic as that which you put together for us. Not even by a fraction. The whole Plandemic is such a strong delusion. The insights you assembled exposed *them* for the vile schemers (and therefore murderers) that they are. How much more distressing the whole thing would have been without that light you shined on the central molerats behind it all, and their conniving stratagems. Things would have been far more confusing, and ever the more vexing for me without the keen understanding you shared with us.
Thank-you for being Polly. The work you do really helps us. And nobody, but nobody, does it even by a fraction as well as do. We love you. Get all the rest you need. May the Lord Jesus be always with you. And again, thank-you for posting.
Yet, sorry to know of the bad spell you are recovering from.
I have been a fan from the very first video I was fortunate enough to see, way back on Youtube. I've never seen any other vlogger even close to doing the excellent work you have done. You really are 'amazing'. The digging for details, and then integrating it all into a coherent picture. And this always conveyed to us with such a heart for truth and clear sense of justice. I still have not heard or read such a clear and comprehensive review of the ratworks behind the Plandemic as that which you put together for us. Not even by a fraction. The whole Plandemic is such a strong delusion. The insights you assembled exposed *them* for the vile schemers (and therefore murderers) that they are. How much more distressing the whole thing would have been without that light you shined on the central molerats behind it all, and their conniving stratagems. Things would have been far more confusing, and ever the more vexing for me without the keen understanding you shared with us.
Thank-you for being Polly. The work you do really helps us. And nobody, but nobody, does it even by a fraction as well as do. We love you. Get all the rest you need. May the Lord Jesus be always with you. And again, thank-you for posting.
Keith Adams
10 Apr 2022
I was worried about you. thank you for letting us know you are ok.
The clocks have turned back to the age of make do and mend. I too scavenge my old pairs of glasses to make a good pair. The tiny screws are the problem. It's a catch 22 you need glasses to repair the glasses you need haha
God bless you Polly
Keith A
The clocks have turned back to the age of make do and mend. I too scavenge my old pairs of glasses to make a good pair. The tiny screws are the problem. It's a catch 22 you need glasses to repair the glasses you need haha
God bless you Polly
Keith A